How to Make Your Own Central American Street Vendor Repellant

Mix one part stank eye to two parts crazy grin over the open flame of your annoyance.

Stir vigorously.

Add dash of facial twitch.

Apply small smears of dirt all over person, liberally. (Volcanic dirt, while rich, is a dead giveaway for "tourist with cash." Dirt road dirt is, instead, recommended.)

Carry beating, er, walking stick.

When approached by relentless vendors, cackle loudly while swinging stick and exclaim:

¡Compraré solamente su alma! ¡Pagaré solamente en maíz!

(I will only buy your soul! I will only pay in corn!)